MRE Menu 22: Jambalaya

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For reasons which don't bear going into, I had the opportunity to eat an MRE today. We had Menu 22: Jambalaya.

SkittlesQuite good. We ate these first
JambalayaFairly intolerable. Mushy, salty, over-peppered and under-spiced
Wheat breadGhastly. Spongy and tasteless and yet somehow vile.
Cheese spreadIncredibly scary looking. I wasn't brave enough to try it but Fluffy said it was appalling
Oatmeal cookieBasically OK. A little dry and not quite as chewy as you would like, but what do you expect for something that lasts 130 months
Lemon-lime electrolyte beverageWe didn't try this, but I assume it's basically gatorade
Flameless heaterIncredibly cool. You just pour water into the pouch and it heats up immediately, warming your food in the process. The best part of this is the diagram on the side, instructing you to pour water into the pouch and then lean the pouch somewhere. Check out these instructions, complete with a picture of the pouch leaning on "a rock or something."
SpoonWe had our own spoons, but it appeared serviceable

Verdict: not totally inedible, but I'm definitely not excited about trying the "meatloaf with gravy."


So why DID you eat an MRE? You must have a reason.

(I have a bunch of MRE-ish food (Earthquake Emergeny Food in my closet), my goal is to NEVER have to eat them. Its like dwarf bread in Terry Pratchett novels. As long as you have a piece of dwarf bread in your pack, its amazing how much is edable instead. Caterpillars. Your shoe. Rocks. Dwarf Bread, just like Mother used to Forge.)

A certain CTO of a publicly traded company recently had his wife leave her work place to bring him a sandwich because he was having a busy day and hungry. In an attempt to encourage matrimonial harmony, we bought him a case of MREs for future emergencies. The lady in questions is an amazing great person and we got her a gold membership on adultfriendfinder.

The bread was truly vile well beyond what you would imagine. It made me want to gag. I very much enjoy trying many foods and have tried an amazing number of weird things (Although I missed out on Adam's experience with the whale sperm - ask him about it). I highly recommend trying the bread once but never being in a situation where you will have to try it more than once.

OK consider the gauntlet thrown, the identity of the sandwich demander shall be discovered.

There cannot be that many CTOs in Mountain View that 1) work for a publicly traded company (it ain't 1999 any more) 2) have a case of meals ready to eat in their office.

Once, on a camping safari in East Africa I got to sample British Officer-grade rations (MREs). They were quite good. They even had desserts!

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